3:35 AM and Nothing to Do

You know what? I'm thinking that would make one great song title.

The Underdog

I've successfully come across a Jonas Brothers song that I can honestly say PERFECTLY describes me. It's called "Underdog" and here are the lyrics:

She's an underdog

Lives next door to me

She's always heard you won't amount to anything

And it kills me to watch the agony beyond her eyes

Tragic the way people pass her by

But now I realize

That everyone sees her

But nobody knows her

She screams in her pillow

For a better tomorrow

She hates it

But she takes it

Watch out for that girl

One day she may change the world

That's the first verse/chorus. If you want to listen to the whole thing then here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kcYYtVBoQPM It's an amazing song, which has made it's way onto my list of official favorites (: Tell me what you thinnnkkkk. Oh, and like my new header?

Merry CHRISTmas!

Since it's officially Christmas (12:37 A.M.) I decided to wish you all a very merry day! Hope you all are content with what ever you have and you don't forget that Jesus is the reason for the season! And I also wanted to show you guys a little poem I wrote earlier:

COUNTERFEIT CHRISTMAS

Away in a manger

A dusty box for His bed

Stowed away in your basement

Smothered by green and red

Instead of the wise men

You've got snowmen and cheer

Forget sheep and oxen when

There's flying reindeer

Instead of the holy child

A jolly old man's on display

Ribbons and bows replace

The bed of hay

Presents wait to be opened

Under the "holiday" tree

Blinded by the lights and ornaments

You've failed to see

This arrangement is empty

Without Jesus it's bland and dry

It's a counterfeit Christmas

Open your eyes

Tell me what you think of the poem! :) I'll post later on today, you know, during the NORMAL waking hours (tehehe) to tell you all about my day. Leave comments and tell me how your Christmas was, too! <3

P.S. If there's any random lurker people on this blog, though I doubt it, if you even think about stealing my poem I will track you down like a wolf. No joke.

Music and Earrings

Chelsea and I aren't starting a band (why is why I deleted my last post!). But anyways, we agreed that our musical styles would clash...a lot. So I'm still gonna start one, I'm DETERMINED to. And I think I know who I'll make it witthhh :) Anyways, I just got my ears pierced again! Right on the cartilage at the top. Ow oww. Here, take a looksie!:

I think it looks cool. Some people *coughJOHNcough* think it's weird. Boys are silly. Anyways, it didn't hurt too much...it kinda felt like my ear was being hole-punched (tehehe). It'll gonna be a bugger to sleep on buuuttt it's worth it!

Do Re Mi...

Me wants to learn how to play guitar. And then I'm gonna start a band :D Hahaha! Who's with me? Anyone? Anyone? I'm serious here. That would be so awesome. We could write songs and then get famous ferreaall ;)

Have a great Christmas everybody <3

Joe Jonas (:

Many of you don't know this yet, but...I have a GIANT crush on Joe Jonas. Like, asjklsdjkldjss. That much. He's hysterical, a Christian, and INCREDIBLY cute!

*dreamy sigh*:

Hahahaha. Gotta love him.

Oh and if you want to be my best friend ever...buy me tickettsss >:D

Just playing. Love you guysss <3>

Randomosity

Okay, so, I haven't posted in like a week so my brain is all fuzzy. Let's see, where to begin? Oh, I know:

NO MORE WORK.

I can't believe it. I'm finally free of that dreaded place I used to call work. Now I'm home free to find a job I like better! Oh, and I can have my weekends to myself like a normal teenager. I swear they wanted me to be their slave.

Hmm, what else? Ah, youth group was entertaining. I wasn't particularly good at "Four On A Chair" (never was) but afterwards Jaina and I had a lovely romp through the giant snow pile. We rolled down it, through it, jumped into/off it, it was amazing! Jaina was hesitant to do the forwards roll because she didn't want to break her neck...she was right. Oops.

Asdsjkldkghkgf good news! I've been wanting to take fencing lessons and it turns out that they have them in my town! So I'll probably start those next month :) And see if I can pull someone along with me as well. I also started the Maximum Ride books. Nudge is my favorite character so far :P

That's all for now...I seriously have no drive to keep typing right now. I've been super tired the past few days and I donno why -_- I'm gonna scoot, ta-ta-for-now!

You know what sucks?

Worrying about money.

Honestly, if you're on the lower end of middle class, you have to worry about gas prices and whether or not you'll make it through bill payments.

And you miss out on things you'd really enjoy, just because you can't pay for it.

I might sound selfish right now...

Or ungrateful.

But I'm not.

I'm just sick and tired of feeling concerned about having to scrape by for another month.

Tired of wanting something so badly, having such a passion for it and striving for it...

But being deprived of that one thing while other people are out flushing their money down the toilet on things they don't really need.

That's what sucks.

Lookit!

I got bored, and I also got to thinking. I gotta get started on this novel of mine. Sooo what's better inspiration than drawing a picture of your main character? Here she is folks, Miss Ava. I still have yet to figure out her last name. Tell me what you think, okay?

Anywho, it's one A.M. and my dad just came out and told me to go to bed. Oops...:) Later!

P.S. Click on the image to see it better <3

I Think I Need Sleep

I mean...just look at my eyes...:

Sigh.

Ow. My Lips Hurt.

I have nothing to post about. Absolutely nothing.

Okay I lied. Today I went on a trail ride in the snow instead of having a real lesson and...OWWWWCHHH. I gotta remember to wear gloves from now on when I'm riding. Really cold air+bare fingers=PAIN. and numbness.

Ohh and did I mention that I quit my job today? Okay, I didn't exactly quit, but I informed my managers that I was leaving. Ha, yeah, that's more like it. I gave them two weeks notice and then I'm outta there. It was beginning to make me miserable. Like...legit. Whenever the weekend rolled around I started to get depressed and pretty lethargic because I knew work was coming up, and honestly I just don't fit in there. I hate it.

So I only hafta work there for like two more days and then I'm home free to find a job I like better. I want to work in a bookstore or an arts and crafts store. Or a tack shop! I would enjoy that a lot. But there's no tack shops around here :( Poo.

Um. So. Yep. Here's something that you need to see:

me: hey look it's john!

john: no

john: it isn't

john: this is his ghost.

me: oh snap

john: can't you tell?

me: Sorry for misinterpreting your transparency. i thought it was a case of bad sushi.

Okay. I'm done here. And...I love you guys. And...comment...

or...

else....

What happens when...

Two people are obviously attracted to each other

...

but neither can muster up the courage to say "hi"?

The Equine Protection Program

Okay, so you can ignore the title because I seriously couldn't think of anything better...but it will be explained later on in this post. But before you get to the good stuff, I get to torture you with a survey that you must read in it's entirety before hearing about...dun dun dun...the dream!:

Name: Brianna of courseeee

Age: 15

Years Riding: like 1.5 now (wish it was more!)

About Your Horse:

If you don't have a horse of your own, do a favorite school horse!)

Name: Scotty

Show Name: --Unknown--

Color: Strawberry roan appaloosa

Breed: I should probably find that out

Markings: Abnormal blaze (haha it's so cute) two socks & two stockings

Gender: Gelding

Age: I should probably find that out too, huh?

Do You Know How To...

Braid?: nah

Band?: nope

Pick out a hoof?: yep

Muck a stall?: of course

Sit a trot?: yup

Post to a trot?: yessir

Jump?: somewhat

Load a horse into a trailer?: not exactly haha

Bridle a horse?: yeesssS

addle a horse?: mhmm

Lead a horse?: uh huh

Clean tack?: bridle yes, saddle no

Check for lameness?: only if it's really obvious

Canter?: yup

Groom a horse?: mhmm

Prepare for a show?: i have a good idea

Put on a winter blanket?: ehh

Mix your horse's feed?: not really

Pull a mane?: I think so

Clip a horse?: yesss

Braid a tail?: I've tried but it hasn't worked yet haha :)

Start a foal?: nah

Ride a bucking horse?: sure

Ride a rearing horse?: nope lol

Lunge a horse?: never tried

Compete in a showmanship class?: not yet

Compete in a trail class?: nah

So, what do you do? nothing as of now, gonna get into jumping though hopefully :)

Ride trails?: sometimes. they bore me unless they're super exciting

Show?: not yet

Just ride for fun?: Sometimes :)

Pleasure (Western Pleasure, HUS)?: i ride english, not western

Dressage?: ick no

Jumping?: soooonnn :D

Equitation? meh

Horsemanship?: nope

Bareback?: mhmm

Speed/gaming?: no

Cross country?: hopefully in the future

Mounted shooting?: i'm not into that

Battle reenacting?: no, that either

Foxhunting?: nooo

Endurance?: nah

Roping?: nope

Cutting?: it looks like fun but once again I don't ride western

Bronc riding?: i would never

Ride-and-tie?: nahh?

Saddleseat?: no

Sidesaddle?: eww no

Driving?: nah

Thoroughbred racing?: i like it but don't participate in it

Standardbred racing?: nopeee

Another kind of racing (e.g. Quarter Horse)?: nah

Polo?: polo's intense, but no

Polocrosse?: huh?

Vaulting?: vaulting is cool! still no

Leadline?: nah

Halter?: no

Showmanship?: nope

Lead-in trail?: no

Now for some random stuff!

How many years have you been riding?: one and a half or something like that

Is your horse shod?: I dunno?

Do you know anything about natural horsemanship?: little bits & pieces of info. :)

What discipline have you not tried that you'd like to try?: xc

When was the last time you fell off?: when Blue bucked me off :(

Have you even fallen off before? chyeah, multiple times

Who was the first horse you ever rode in a lesson?: (where I'm riding now?) Cori

How old was the oldest horse you've ever ridden?: in the 20's

What about the youngest horse?: No clue

Have you ever handled a stallion?: Mhmm

What about a foal?: nope

What do you think about helmets?: they keep my head in one piece, so I like them

Do you like giving your horse a bath?: Yeahh it's fun :D

Is your horse really hot, really calm, or somewhere in the middle?: In the middle. Scotty's spooky.

Does your horse spook a lot?: yeahh, see above. he freaks over tiny things.

Have you ever used your horse's tail brush on yourself?: not yet haha

Have you used one of those groomer stones?: ???

Have you ever ridden along a road?: yup, a few times. it attracted some strange looks from people driving by lol.

Have you ever ridden into a body of water?: if a flooded bridge counts, then yeah :)

Do you like grooming your horse?: yessssssss!

Have you ever fallen off at a show?: nope

Do you like petting your horse's nose? yeah :P

Has a horse ever fallen on you?: no, but it's bound to happen sometime.

Have you ever ridden...?

An Appaloosa?: Scotty is an Appy!

A Quarter Horse?: Think so

A Thoroughbred?: nope

A Mustang?: Want to!

A pony?: Mhmm, Littleman :3

A horse over 16 hands?: maybe a 16 hh horse, not over though.

A Shire?: nope

A Percheron?: no

A Clydesdale?: nah but it would be nasstyy :)

An American Saddlebred?: Maybe?

A Morgan?: YES. Morgans are fast little buggers.

More random stuff time!

Do you own a pair of breeches?: like 3 pairs haha

Have you ever walked without stirrups?: of course

Trotted without stirrups?: mhmm

Cantered without stirrups?: nope

Jumped without stirrups?: not yet

Have you ever ridden without reins?: yup!

In your first lesson, were you put on a lunge line?: yeah, but not at where i'm riding now.

Have you ever had a lesson on the lunge line?: uhh no?

Do you like psycho horses?: well they can be entertaining haha.Do you like sturdy, reliable horses?: I like a challenge, but I also need to be able to trust my horse. so for the most part, yes.

Is your horse good about having his/her feet lifted?: NO. Scotty has ouchie feet, and he's bothered by them being lifted :(

Is your horse's mane wild? naahhh

Will your horse ground tie?: ???

What color is your saddle pad?: i always use a red one :)

What color is your horse's halter?: leather (brown)

What color lead rope do you have?: i don't own any, but the barn has like 2390283922 million

Have you ever given your horse Gatorade (or something like that)? nope. but i hear they like it!Does your horse switch his tail and hit you?: sometimes accidentally in the stall. it hurts haha.

Have you ever been to a breed show?: nahh

Are you in 4-H or Pony Club?: nope

What color is the manure fork that you use most often?: nothing specific

Do you prefer straw or felt hats?: uhh neither haha

What color breeches do you like most?: my black oneeess :)

Have you ever won a belt buckle?: nuh uh

Do you ever carry a crop?: sometimes

Do you ever wear spurs?: never

What color is the barn?: brown

Yeah, okay, so now that you're officially bored, I'll start explaining about the dream I had last night. It was highly interesting, and it had a lot of meaning to me. You'll see why:

I was walking down a city road in the middle of the night with Scotty (the horse of course!). We turned into a dark alleyway that held no light at all, yet we continued to proceed down it anyways. It was littered with garbage and I just wanted to get out of there and get home as soon as possible. So we kept walking but I heard a slight noise behind me and I can barely make out the face of a man leaning on the fence behind me. He is fat and bald and covered in grease stains, and looks like he belongs in the cooking area of a fast food resteraunt. Startled by seeing him there I stop for a split second with Scotty still by my side and gasp because I see a long, sharp knife in his hand. I start to walk away again, quicker this time, but keeping my eyes on the man. He tells me in a gruff voice that he was just cutting things with the knife (trying to reassure me that he wasn't going to hurt me) but I could tell he was lying just by his voice and looking at his eyes. I started to jog away quickly and turned the corner. I could hear the man following, so frantically I step up on a crate and then in just a moment I am on Scotty's back and we are galloping away. This is the end of the dream, but the galloping lasts a few moments and it is just the best feeling I have ever experienced. I feel like all of my worries are shedding away and that nothing can catch us.

The symbolicism hidden in there can be interpreted in a few ways, atleast in my opinion. It shows that even in times of fear and trouble, having a horse can help you get through it. Horses are the best animals there ever were, and I can feel a huge connection with them whenever I'm around them. I also see it as, when I'm riding or when I'm with Scotty I don't have to worry about anything other than having fun or just enjoying my time there. Lastly I can also see it being interpreted as the feeling of freedom someone gets when they're riding, the ability to be carefree and unafraid. Just sitting in the saddle gives you an enormous amount of courage and a feeling of security. You probably have no idea how much I love horses and being with them and riding, or know how any of these emotions feel when it comes to horses, but it is the most important thing to me (other than Jesus, family & friends, of course!) and only other horse people can understand that kind of feeling.

Ssshhh...

The door creaking

Sink leaking

Why can't it

Just be silent

For a moment

And then maybe

I'd be able to

Hear my thoughts.

Maybe Another Day

Saying hello to you seems an impossible feat

The words catch on my tongue and I try to repeat

The phrases I practiced over and over again

The way I'm feeling, it's hard to explain

When you walk by I try to speak

But my mouth is dry, my knees are weak

I stand in silence as you make your way

Oh well, maybe another day..

I was in a poem writing mood. If you don't know what this is about then maybe I'll tell you sometime. (I'm in a blah mood right now so comments will make me happy, kapeesh?)

I Applaud My Managers

For telling me I don't have to work tommorow.

THANK.

YOU.

Looking Into The Past

Did you know that when you look up to the Heavens during the night and see hundreds of stars twirling about, you're actually looking into the past? It's the truth; the light from outer space takes so long to reach Earth, it's lightyears old! But living where I live, well, I never really get the chance to see that many stars doing a ballet in the navy blue evenings, but when I do choose to venture outside and tilt my head up, I cherish my limited view. Just a minute ago I was outside, sitting against the side of my house on the porch rail gazing up at the night sky. As cars whizzed by I can assume I was a sight to behold to passerby, sitting alone on my porch at night with knee high striped socks and an astounded expression (I mean, it's not everyday that kids actually appreciate things anymore, right?). But the way I looked was unimportant, I was too busy being fascinated by the Lord's glorious creations. The stars were like a map or connect-the-dot illustrations to some unknown story we haven't quite figured out yet. Maybe, it's God's blueprint. Whatever the stars happen to be, whether floating compressed orbs of space debris or celestial wonders, I am utterly astounded by the beauty that God made them to be. So, whoever's reading this right now, I challenge you to get up off the couch or, rather, your computer chair, quit reading this blog post, go outside and take a few moments to look into the past...

Caffeine;; Please Drink Responsibly

Depending on your definition of "drunk" you could probably say that Jaina and I were drunk last night. Of course not on alcohol, silly. But...caffeine. I think caffeine should be labeled as more dangerous than alcohol, seeing as alcohol puts you in a stupor while caffeine just...transforms you into a lunatic. So while I guzzled down a fresh Monster and Jaina slurped up a tall peppermint coffee, something went berserk in our brains and BAM! We were psychos. I think we've officially set a record for freaking everyone out at Youth Group. Especially the boys. Ha.

I also made a sign for the Youth Conference (so did Jaina and Caleb) which came out much better than I expected! Hm...what else can I tell you about? Oh! Thursday night I spent a hundred and fifty dollars on new riding boots. I swear I'm addicted. After that I went riding and Scotty, my love, being the photogenic horse he is posed with me:

Are we not the cutest horsey couple you have ever seen? Scotty is just amazing. I loff 'im.

Huh...what else can I type about today? Well, I wrote a really depressing poem yesterday, which I thought up when walking home from school and looking at the trees. I wrote it down yesterday at Youth Group. So far Jaina's the only one who's heard it. Maybe I'll show you someday...I think I'll go have a Monster.

Failure To Excommunicate

"Every week you work up the strength to fight the flames that are hurled.

Let your faith shine right through.

You know it's the world

versus Jesus and you."

I think this song, these lyrics in particular, describe everything I'm going through right now at school. I am one of the only devout Christians at my school, maybe the only one. It may seem pretty unbelievable since most of you are surrounded by Jesus' followers on a day-to-day basis, but I struggle with convictions and trials when standing for my faith. I am challenged by classmates and even teachers for that matter, nearly every day in front of the class I have to fight the good fight. If you know me very well, you'll realize that I am NOT the kind of person who is going to give up just because everyone's against her, I am NOT the kind of person who is going to conform to superficial trends or attitudes. I am a determined (and maybe a little bit ornery) kind of person that won't settle for neutral...and my teachers are just beginning to see this part of me emerging (since it hasn't been a real issue before now). I'm not complaining, don't get me wrong, I'm truly glad to be given a daily oppurtunity to profess my faith before the lost souls of my high school. I'm just asking that you'll all pray for me to have strength and that the Holy Spirit will give me the right words to say when standing up for Christ.

And I also wanted to encourage everyone else to do the same...you may be nervous at first but the jitters disappear once you realize how much the people need to be witnessed to.

"Stand up for what you believe in, even if you're standing alone."

Cough is a funny word

So I've been home for three days--off of work this weekend and out of school today--feeling like...well...poop. I've just been sitting at home doing nothing, wasting my day away watching the Saddle Club on YouTube. It's like, the only horse show out there. Anyways, I really wanna get back to school tommorow. I enjoy it for some *cough*reasons*cough* which I will not mention on a public blog! Anyways...I got new shoes! They're comfy black vans (you know, the skateboarding shoes?) and...yeahh. They're snazzy. Like your face.

Have you noticed that "cough" is a funny word? It has no substance to it...I dunno. I'm gonna go zone out in front of my tv or something...*drool* Buhhbyez :(

Today's Lesson

I had a riding lesson today...just like every Thursday. And let me just tell you now that Scottie is the silliest, cutest, most fun horse you will ever meet. He can be a little bit skittish at times but I always just wanna squeeze the daylights outta him. He's amazing. Uhmayzing. Uh-may-zing. (Can you tell I've been drinking Coke?) Anyways, today we worked on cantering the figure eight, and I have a picture and a video for you! Lucky little devils:

Everyone says we're a good pair. I agree. It's a tad blurry but I still luff it...and Scottie! Anywho this is after the lesson when I had to walk him out because he was hot, and breathing pretty heavy (we worked a lot today) and that can be dangerous to a horse if you leave them that way. So I walked him around till he was cool and Grandpa took the picture on my request <3>

Video time:

http://s13.photobucket.com/albums/a270/Raven777/?action=view&current=SCOTTYMYLOVE017.flv

Okay I understand that in the beginning my seat was...like...really sloppy. After that I got it under control though and, though none of you know too much about riding, I have to admit that Scottie breaking into a trot here and there was partially my fault, partially the fault of whoever designed the riding ring. What I'm trying to say is it's a tiny ring probably not meant for cantering, so it's hard for Scottie to turn corners without trotting, but whatever. I think we did fine. Oh yeah, this was our first time actually cantering the figure eight, so don't criticize me...I know my riding faults! :)

Okely dokely. My throat is uber sore and...and...and...I've got better things to do then post on here. Okay I don't ;) I was joking. I love posting. The internet kind and the horse kind. Ha. Ha. Very funny Bri. Okay I'm gone. NO, wait I'm not. Needless to say...I HAVE NEW AVATARS on my sidebar! Uhm...check 'em ouuttt? :D Okaybyebye.

P.S. I've officially labeled myself an avatard...*gigglesnort* Bye. For real this time.

Hehe.

Yum...pixels

Title? Please, don't ask. Anyways, since I'm super dooper oopely doopely bored right now, my imagination has been wandering and I decided to have a fun little time here all by myself. How, you are asking? Why I'll tell you. I'm going to find an avatar or two (or three...or ten) to describe each one of you...'you' being my youth group girlies...*coughakatheonlypeoplethatreadthisblogcough* Anyways, here I go:


Jaina:










Tori:








Sophie:










Meghan:









Rachel:









Erika:







Kaeleigh:












Madison:








Ashlee:







There you have it. I tried my best to find stuff that would describe you guys well...I hope you likey, eh? Tell me what you think!


P.S. These were in no particular order :)

AAA;

Welcome to AAA;

Avatar Addicts Anonymous.

If now or at any time in the past you have felt a need to log onto Iconator, obsessively search for avatars that somehow describe you or something you are feeling, you need some help. Sadly, I cannot give you that help because I myself am also an addict. Oh well.

Ha. Ha. I am truly beginning to become obsessed with the pretty little avatars that I find that relate to myself and my life. It's like giving you my life story in the form of little 100x100 pixel square photographs that have inspiring sayings or lyrics scribbled onto them. I don't know why, but when I find one that particularly fits me, I snatch it up and it makes me feel special. Simple mind, simple pleasures (I'm only joking. My mind is a complex labyrinth of reality and fantasy. You get inside my brain and you'll never get out!) Anywhom, I'm on my way to Jaina's soon. Loverly little jainer-poo. Hey, did you know that when I'm bored I pick strings outta my jeans? Oh, you did? Okay, just checking. Uhmm...urr...yepp. I'm gonna go draw now.

Bye lovvies :]

Today's the Day!

Today's the day where Tori, Ashlee, Kaeleigh and I are going to be baptised. This is a very important day in each of our lives because we're proclaiming that we are going to live for Jesus. Also, we will all "die" today, not literally of course, but figuratively. When we're submerged in the water, we are "dying", and then when we're raised up again we're being ressurected. Anywho, if you're reading this, just please pray for me and the other girls, especially since I don't like speaking in front of crowds too much, and I'm pretty nervous. I'll make another post later telling you how it goes!

EDIT;; I was baptised! Wee! And I wasn't nervous at all, and although some of the other girls were a bit anxious we all got through it just fine. It was awesome to see three of my great friends being baptised along with me, and we even had some laughs. Kaeleigh and I both messed up a little, but it was okay because everyone in the church laughed and understood. Anyways, here are some avatars I found that I thought related to this post:

I've Switched Back!

Alright, alright, now that I've THOROUGHLY confused you guys, I've switched back to Blogspot! I decided to do this because:

• It's easier to switch templates (which I had a heck of a time doing on xanga)
• I can post icons on here, (which I can't do on xanga)
• You can actually comment my blog now <3
• And...and...I love you guys :)

So once again a new start, and hopefully I'll find a new template to go along with it.

Muchooo love <3

Bri